The OWN Network has blessed us with another black-ass dating show. The Never Ever Mets follows seven couples who all met online. The lovers are in different stages of their online romances; some have been dating for a few months and others have been their love affairs for several years. The one thing they have in common is that they have never met in person—until now. The couples will all come together to live under one roof, where they will have an opportunity to see if their computer love carries over into the real world. They will receive coaching from show’s host Ta’Rhonda Jones as well as some relationship experts who will pop in to check in on the digital-lovers.
We first meet the ladies who arrive at the mansion in hopes of meeting their cyber-baes, instead they meet each other. They also learn that all seven of them will be sharing a bedroom.This seems like a recipe for disaster, but okay.The ladies are told that their men are out planning dates for them, they are instructed to put on their “freak-um dresses” and get prepared to be wined and dined. Let’s meet the couples.
Brandan and Sienna
Sienna is a 43-year-old New Yorker and her man, Brandan, 35, who hails from Florida. The two have been kicking it virtually for 10 months and they are beyond eager to meet each other. Sienna is dressed in a sexy pink two piece skirt set when she walks into a private Italian cooking class. Her man Brandan greets her with a bouquet of flowers while he gushes over her beauty—and her high heels. The two share a flirty conversation over gnocchi and wine. Brandan is pleased with what he sees and Sienna has “happy feelings” about Brandan, but she is not ready to say the L word. The chemistry between these two is obvious and infectious. But this is reality TV, so we are hoping for the best and preparing for a second-hand heart break.
JoAnna (aka Jody) and Aaron J
JoAnna, the Chicagoan, has been dating Aaron J for nine months. The Georgia man claims he previously booked a flight to visit JoAnna but he lost his ID, so he was unable to get through TSA. This slip-up has already put a bad taste in JoAnna’s mouth because sis doesn’t understand why he only has one form of identification—and it also kind of sounds like bullshit. JoAnna’s annoyance carries over into their first date when Aaron J tried to impress her with his salsa moves. Homeboy was quite rusty with the dance steps and JoAnna wasn’t impressed. The Georgia native admitted to trying to appease JoAnna’s Afro-Latina heritage, but sis saw it as a patronizing fail. He then invited her to sit down for some wine and charcuterie. The gesture seemed to fuel her exasperation even more when she realized her guy didn’t know how to use a wine bottle opener. She rolled her eyes as she reached for the bottle and took matters in her own hands. Cringe. It appears the brown-skinned beauty has already made up her mind about Aaron. Sorry to that man.
Dymond and Aaron H.
Dymond and Aaron H have been dating online for five whole years and they have yet to meet in person. Aaron H, is a 51-year-old preacher’s kid who says Dymond is the woman of his dreams. He is even more impressed when he sees the 43-year-old in person and realizes she is thicker than a bowl of oatmeal. Uncle Aaron says he loves BBW’s, so he can’t wait to wrap himself up in Dymond’s suppleness. But not so fast, Dymond has some questions.
We learn that during their relationship, Dymond found out via a Facebook post that her man was about to propose to another woman. According to Uncle Aaron, he pursued a back-up bride because he didn’t know if things were going to work out between him and Dymond. Maybe if he made an attempt to meet her in person during their five-year courtship, he would have more clarity. But Dymond seems to be satisfied with the explanation, she forgives her virtual bae. The couple exchange “I love you’s” and all is well.
Mille and Gregg
Mille and Gregg have been in a Facetime relationship for three years. Millie lives in Los Angeles and Gregg lives in… Los Angeles. We get it, LA traffic is horrific, but damn three years? Gregg says he hasn’t attempted to meet his neighbor in real life because he feared he might mess things up. But he seems to do just fine when he and Millie meet up for a romantic boat ride. They seem to be a nice match, so we hope one of them will now gain the courage to brave the 405 for more in-person interaction.
Shay and Josh
Shay is a Miami girl and her man Josh lives in Tennessee. The two have been in a cyber relationship for 12 years—TWELVE. When the two meet, they lock lips immediately and then set off for a roller coaster ride on the Santa Monica pier. Josh’s delicious Tennessee drawl and his gentle-manly swag makes it easy to see why Shay is so smitten with him — but not “waiting for 12-damn-years” smitten.
When she asks Josh why he never came to Miami to visit her, he says because he can’t be too far away from his kids, one of whom is a three-year-old daughter. The math is not mathing. It seems like Shay needs some AUNTIES in her life.
Sandia and Chris
Sandia has been dating her potential beau Chris for three months. They both live in Florida but have yet to meet in person. The Haitian beauty says she’s a little skeptical about Chris because he seems to enjoy the strip club a little too much for her taste. When the pair meet, they seem like a match made in heaven. They unintentionally wear matching mint green outfits and they look great together. Sandia is impressed when her handsome suitor takes her on a helicopter ride, especially because it was something that she casually mentioned in a previous conversation.
Just as we are basking in the afterglow of their romantic date, we see an ugly side of the good-looking lad. Later that night, the men gather in the kitchen to discuss their dates and Chris puts on an Oscar-worthy performance of toxic masculinity. He puffs out his chest and boasts about bagging a plethora of women. He goes on to tell them he plays with women’s emotions by giving them “three-to-four days of romance” before disappearing for a few weeks. When the brothers didn’t cosign on his vibrato, he called them stupid. According to Chris, no matter how good you treat women “she will look for another nigga eventually.”
WTF?
Chris should make an appointment with a therapist immediately.
When the chauvinist realizes that Sandia is ear hustling from the kitchen door, he loudly and rudely dismisses her, clearly putting on a show for the guys. It’s giving podcast bro vibes.
As much as we like looking at her beautiful face, Sandia should just pack her things and go now.
Alexis and Dominique
Alexis from Texas has been dating her long distance lover for 5 months. Dominique lives in Chi-town and he cannot wait to meet his online bae. He admits to being disappointed when he meets her in person. He says that he was unimpressed with Alexis’ body, because it appeared different from her photos. He claims to not be attracted to her toned physique, but we couldn’t tell because homeboy was handsy as hell. He gripped her waist and pressed his body up against hers as they partook in a sexually charged “yoga” session. Alexis was none the wiser as she gushed over their mutual “chemistry” and even hinted at giving up the draws later.
But their chemistry seemed to turn lethal later that night when Alexis joked with Gregg about his “hoochie daddy shorts.” Dominique deemed the playful banter as disrespectful and he promised to point out the next “fat ass” in the house. The burly man held Alexis in his arms as they conversed, so it was difficult to tell whether their heated conversation was playful or serious. But shit got real when he aggressively pushed Alexis away from him.
WTF?
He then got real close to her and told her to “stop playing” with him. She then pushed him away from her. Security!
No seriously, where the hell was security? We love a little drama, but this was way too much.
The Neverevermets airs Fridays at 8pm Est on OWN and MAX.
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